Thanatology

I've lost a lot of friends. I’ve been left behind
One too many times; I can see it all unwind
In my mind, just like time has stopped.
I see their bodies drop, and every tick of the clock
Is louder than a gunshot; Father Time packs a Glock.
Frank, when is this gonna stop?
Every day waking up from nightmares, so scared
Of the time it takes my brain to remember 'I couldn't have saved him; he's
Been dead since December'. It was just a dream, or maybe his dismembered
Awareness haunting me, making me remember
All the things that I have seen and that fleeting, fragile ember;
The light that glows inside my chest will burn a hundred years or less.
My mind can't help but to obsess and panic when it comes to death.
On one hand, God might have my back; a paradise of wine and snacks.
More likely he would char me black for sins amassed and virtues lacked.
But God (if God exists at all) has yet to return a single one of my phone calls.
To God we would be so small, the chance he'd notice us at all
Is hella slim; the last point on my list is, God might not even exist.
And if there is no God, no right or wrong, then we're just fatally flawed
Personality is nothing but a bitter facade, anything that makes us unique or odd
Is just a complex mathematical fraud; every word you speak, every single nod
Every single choice you make is an illusion, leading towards a certain conclusion.
Without the comfort of faith or delusion, I confine myself to a life of seclusion.
Yeah, I'm so conflicted and it makes no sense. If God exists, then why would he just keep us in suspense?
Why scare us with these immense concepts like Oblivion, morality and complex
Mathematical systems run by physics alone? If God's so mighty, why can't he pick up a phone
And give Earth a ring, just to say 'Hi'? That'd end all debate over who rules the sky.
In the celestial blink of an eye, God could outshine every fear every night.
But God does nothing. Is he ignoring our plight?  Or do our prayers go unheard every night?
In either case, we should all be prepared for eternal oblivion, but don't be scared.
It's natural to die, whatever you believe. It's natural to cry; natural to bereave.
We all say goodbye, don't be so naive. Life is a treasure, and Death’s a fucking thief.
Remember, though: 'dead' ain't as bad as it sounds. Sure, they stick you in a box for the worms underground
But before you were born [and how's this for profound?] you spent ten billion years being dead all around.
Those aeons of unlife weren't really that bad, and death is no different; think peaceful, not sad.
If you're not convinced, or you think me quite mad, or you don't like this rap, that's just too fucking bad.
The final word is, we'll drive ourselves mad if we're looking for proof when we don't understand
The forces involved on a scale so grand. There's no way to be sure, however well you plan.
So live in the moment that now is at hand; leave death to the dying. Leave fear in the sand.
Accept the unknowns in the world like a man; have faith in yourself, and be good to the land.